Book & Literary Inquiries Only:
Dan Mandel, Sanford J. Greenburger & Associates: email@example.com
All Other Inquiries:
*Note: Due to the spread of COVID-19, I am not able to do any in-person speaking engagements. I hope to resume this in 2024.
If you could have the perfect sandwich, what would it be?
A Sweeney’s Southern Pulled Pork Sandwich from Hayward’s Pit Bar-B-Que in Shawnee, Kansas.
Have you ever fantasized about winning the lottery?
Of course. Although these days I’d just put all of the money into VTSAX over at Vanguard and just live off the annual 3% in interest as explained here.
Can you describe the rest of your life in 5 words or less?
Living with my smoking hot wife. Oh crap. That was six words, huh?
You get one song to listen to for the rest of your life, what is it?
Daft Punk’s “One More Time”. You can listen to it here. That song kept me company when I would be up doing laundry at 3 am on a Saturday night at Alfred State. I know. I was a real party animal back then.
Cats or Dogs?
Cats. You don’t have to take them outside. Once you’ve experienced walking a dog in -40 degree weather, you’ll never want a dog again either.
What is the most used app on your phone?
Spotify. I listen to a lot of old jazz (think: Miles Davis, Dave Brubeck, Coltrane) when I’m working or reading comic books.
What’s your favorite and least favorite smell?
The smell from the Strawberry Napalm disposable vape 3Chi makes is my favorite smell. My least favorite is the sweaty balls smell that can be found by visiting any men’s locker room anywhere on this planet.
You fly a lot between Los Angeles and upstate New York. Do you prefer the window seat or the aisle?
It depends on the flight. If the flight is like the one from NYC to London, where you can see the sunset in New York and then rise in London, that’s pretty spectacular and worth the window seat.
The thing is, I have a chronic illness that requires me to stay hydrated. Which… You know. Means I gotta get up to pee at least three times on a flight. So for that reason alone, I tend to go with the aisle seat.
What is your favorite action movie?
“Con Air.” “Con Air” is the greatest film of all time, and someday I’m going to make the time to sit down and write a funny, scene-by-scene recap of that movie just like Geoff Dyer did with “Where Eagles Dare”.
Have you ever asked anyone for their autograph?
I once stood in a two-hour-long line, alongside a 68-year-old Andorian, waiting to get William Shatner’s autograph for my Dad. When he was a little boy, he used to run home to watch Star Trek, and that in turn generated a love for Star Trek that everyone in my family has.
When it was my turn to get his autograph, I was completely speechless. Which is rare for me, as you might have guessed from this contact page.
P.S. I wanted to talk to William Shatner about this, but Mr. Shatner does not do podcast interviews. (I asked.)
Apples or Oranges?
Apples, but only with honey to help celebrate the new year.
What is the scariest animal?
That Red Panda at the Rosamond Gifford Zoo who wanted to fight me.
What do you think happens when we die?
We wake up and do this all over again. But if we’re lucky, we’ll remember some of the mistakes we made the last time so we don’t make them again.
All questions are from The Colbert Questionnaire. Someday, I hope to be cool enough to be on the Late Show and answer these questions.